Don't bank on it

A couple of years ago, somebody at my bank pressed the wrong button and I was charged two-hundred-and-forty-odd euros for something I'd already paid for... Oh well, not to worry, I thought - a quick phone call should do the trick....

Peter Edgerton www.peteredgerton.com

Friday, 10 March 2023, 01:00

A couple of years ago, somebody working at my bank - possibly distracted by the thought of where their next 'cafelito' was coming from - pressed the wrong button on their keyboard and I was charged two-hundred-and-forty-odd euros for something I'd already paid for the previous week..Oh well, not to worry, I thought - a quick phone call should do the trick and all will be well within twenty-four hours. Oh dear, how wrong I was.

Nine long, arduous months later, I finally received the blessed refund, profuse apologies from the bank very much conspicuous by their absence.

In fact, it was only because I'd reached my wits' end and fired off what one might call a 'somewhat forthright' email to the national head office, that anything got done at all.

Within twenty-four hours of my bolshy missive, the money was back in my account and the woman at the Malaga branch who'd failed singularly to do her job for the previous thirty-six weeks hasn't been seen since.

I do hope the bigwigs sent her to work in one of the few village banks that still exist where the locals famously give short shrift to the obfuscation and bluster that are so much easier to get away with in a big city.

Anyway, the whole sorry episode was little more than a sepia-tinged memory until this week when I was charged twice within two days for the same load of beer barrels. Aaaaagh!!

After some deep-breathing exercises and deftly assuming the lotus position (actually, to tell the truth, I just panted a lot and crouched on my haunches like a demented troll), I called the bank.

It wasn't their fault, apparently; it was the fault of the beer barrel company's bank. So, I called the beer barrel company and they called their bank.

It's been nine days now and some people are still calling some other people but some of them are on holiday and some are 'in meetings' (this may well mean having coffee and cake).

Screenshots of transactions and virtual dockets have been pinging hither and yon through the ether but, in practical terms, nothing has happened.

However, little do they know, I've got the number of this bank's head office scribbled on a bit of paper, sitting patiently by the phone. They've got until Tuesday.

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