THE MUSIC MAKER
If you think TikTok is something to do with tiny mint sweets which are much more difficult to get out of their little plastic box than the adverts would have you believe, you can stop reading right here. This column is for the young and the hip; in other words those that know what TikTok really is and what it's used for. Actually, I just had to check what it is used for.
The good news is, that among the top twenty most viewed videos on the application, there don't appear to be any plates of food. We can only hope that younger generations are chortling heartily at the folly of this fashion so prevalent among their parents and chums. The bad news is, it's hard to discern exactly what is being watched. It seems that the most liked or viewed or something is somebody with an indecipherable name lip-syncing to a song by somebody else with an equally indecipherable name. It's not clear which of them is more famous. Nor is it clear what 'lip-syncing' is. I imagine it's what we used to call 'miming' and, if you caught your sister indulging in said practice, employing a hair brush as a microphone, performing ABBA's Waterloo in front of the bedroom mirror, she would slam the door shut, screaming in agony and not emerge for days out sheer shame. Or maybe that was just our house. Anyway, it seems that the opposite is true now - lip-miming is something to be proud of and posted on the interweb for all to see.
The list of most popular videos on TikTok also includes lots of dance routines and quite a few cats, possibly involved in dance routines. To be honest, I got a bit bored reading about it all and certainly wasn't tempted to actually have a look at any of the content. I've better things to do, you see, like sprawl on the sofa, staring blankly into space, dribbling faintly from the corner of my mouth.
This week Scottish postman Nathan Evans - who may or may not now start calling himself N to the E for more street cred - shot to fame for singing The Wellerman on TikTok. (No, no, it's a sea shanty, not a tribute to The Jam's lead singer. Do keep up.)
I did watch a bit of that and it sounded very much like most things you'd hear at a Tuesday night folk club somewhere. Still, Nathan caught the zeitgeist and has two or three million views, which is only a couple of billion or so behind that girl singing into her hairbrush or whatever.
See? It's the future and it all makes sense.
Now, where did I put my mints?